Bedroom Monsters

April 25, 2011

The PAP is like your mean old grandmother who told you that the police will catch you if you don’t do as she says or that the monsters under your bed will devour you if you don’t go to sleep. Threats have always been the weapon of the lazy. Its anti-intellectual, irrational, but damn it’s effective.

It’s been a week since Polling Day was announced and already we’ve been treated to a smorgasbord of bedroom monsters of all sorts.

Bedroom monster #1

The Workers’ Party calls for a “First World Parliament”, Indranee Rajah paints a picture of Parliamentary gridlock.

This is really semantics at its most inane. I refuse to believe that Indranee cannot see that the WP means “First World Parliament” to be an internationally accepted standard where there are checks and balances, robust debates, and challenges to the incumbent party. If Indranee wanted to appeal to voters’ reason, she could have said: “Yes, we need a First World Parliament, but can the Opposition offer sensible and responsible debate? Have the NMPs outshone the three Opposition MPs and NCMP in Parliament?” No, instead she resorts to playground taunting – name a country, name a country, you can’t name a country, neh nanny boo boo! So much for raising the level of national debate.  

Bedroom monster #2

Ng Eng Hen warns voters of a “freak election result” if they support the opposition.

This is an old monster. It rears its ugly head every five years. It’s so familiar we’re no longer afraid of it. It’s so familiar we’ve invited it to snuggle up to us. It’s so familiar we’ve even given it a name – bullshit.

Bedroom monster #3

Ng Eng Hen casts doubts on Chen Show Mao’s ability to represent Singaporeans after being overseas for 30 years.

Ng’s logic is as follows: You need to be in Singapore to understand Singapore > Chen has not been in Singapore for 30 years > Chen does not understand Singapore > ergo: Chen cannot represent Singaporeans. Let’s apply the same logic to new citizens. New citizens spent most of their lives in their original country > They do not understand Singapore > ergo: They need to return their pink ICs and red passports. Immigration problem solved.

Bedroom monster #4

Teo Chee Hean warns of “high insurance premium” in response to the WP’s calls for Singaporeans to strengthen the Opposition in case the PAP fails.

Here, I can do no better than to quote another blogger. “What Singaporeans will actually be paying a high premium for are [PAP] “understudies” who aren’t ready to be MPs and to pay S$15,000 a month for each of these 20-plus “understudies”. Do the maths. $15,000 a month per “understudy”, is equal to S$900,000 for each of them for a five-year term. Multiply that by say 24 new PAP “understudies” and you and I will be paying a premium of : S$21,600,000 !!! This must be the most expensive premium for “understudy MPs” anywhere on this planet.”

I’m really looking forward to more bedroom monsters from the PAP camp. The more they let loose, the more they remind me of mean old grannies. And the thing about PAP and grannies is that you’ll always be a child in their eyes.


3 Responses to “Bedroom Monsters”

  1. Chaikin Says:

    The kind of responses that the likes of Indranee (Senior Counsel huh?) Ng Heng Hean (surgeries were no-brainers, really) Teo Chee Hean (another of those military hot shots where they cannot tell the difference between rank and real opinions) indicate just one thing – it is GAME OVER, and these are the responses of the panicking leadership.

    Tell me honestly, who would want to pay $2 or $3 million for the likes of Vivian, Wong Kan Seng, Teo Ser Luck in the real world?

  2. anon Says:

    Quite right. With very very few exceptions, we can change virtually all the current ministers, junior ministers, senior parl sec, parl sec WITHOUT any impact on the running of the ministries because the real work is done by the ministries’ Perm Secs and below.

  3. Alan Wong Says:

    Remember the old man’s own bedroom monster of “a bad dose of incompetent government” made real during the last few years by none other than our PAP Ministers themselves.

    Who would have ever thought that they would be that ‘cunning’ enough to raid our hard-earned CPF savings during our HDB flat transaction and have them discreetly transferred to grow their reserves and help pay for their obscene salaries ?

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